The Slow Reveal
It takes months. Then it's the whole thing.
You need receipts before you hand anything over
Feelings get spoken out loud, on purpose, often
You want the lives actually mixed together
Who you are
You're warm and verbal and you still take forever to actually trust it. Early on you're friendly, funny, easy to talk to — and holding back the layer underneath. Then somewhere around month five a door opens and a completely different amount of person walks through.
The people who wait for that describe it the same way: like being let in. You don't hand out access, so when someone gets it, they know it means something. That scarcity is real value, not a game you're playing.
But the wait is invisible from the outside. Plenty of good people leave in month three thinking you weren't that interested, when you were just not done deciding. You lost some of them to a process you never explained.
Say the process out loud. "I'm slow with this and it isn't about you" is the single most useful sentence available to you, and almost nobody in your position ever says it.
You know it's you when…
- You're friendly for months before you're actually open
- Someone left thinking you weren't interested. You were
- The version of you at month six is a different person
Who you click with
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